Ode to Ianthe Mosselman | Between Motherhood and Ambition

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Ianthe Mosselman moved to Amsterdam when she was eighteen, a decision that changed her life forever. “Amsterdam is the city where I grew up,” she says. This is where she built her life: she studied, found her first job, became a mother and developed into a program maker at De Balie. The city not only meant freedom to her, but was also a place where she could both anonymously blend into the crowd and find like-minded people.

The challenge of motherhood and work

One of the biggest challenges in Ianthe's life is balancing her career and motherhood. “I want to do my best at everything,” she says, ‘but sometimes they take time away from each other, and then I feel like I'm falling short.’ Combining a full-time job with caring for her children is a constant learning process. Yet this challenge has brought her a lot: she has learned to better set her boundaries.
 

“My children have taught me to much better set boundaries and say what I can and cannot do. I am someone who quickly picks up things and automatically says, 'Oh, I'll clean that up.' But with children, that is not always possible. I have had to learn to sometimes just sit back and say, 'I will not do that.'”

One moment sticks with her. There was a time when she had arranged childcare and a babysitter for her children five days a week. People often asked how she had organized that—which days childcare, which days she was at home. Sometimes she would just say, “Yes,” without further explanation. “I found it difficult to say that I worked every day. As if I had to justify it,” she recalls. This realization taught her that she did not always have to expose herself. ”You can protect yourself from outside reactions.”

Plea for understanding
 

Ianthe hopes that her story will inspire other women. “I want to show that it is possible. That you can make time for meaningful and important work and find happiness in it, even if you have children.” She even wrote a book while she was a mother, something that makes her especially proud. “Sometimes you just have to do it, despite the difficulties.”
 

What Ianthe hopes most of all is that people will be nicer to mothers. “If you are on the tram with a pram, you sometimes have to fight for a spot. I think people should be more understanding of people who are caring for small children. A little extra kindness can make such a difference.”

Ianthe's strength and perseverance do not come out of nowhere. Her mother is her greatest source of inspiration. “She always worked and was always there for us.” Her mother taught her that the attention and care you put into something makes a big difference. “For St. Nicholas' Day, she would always create a treasure hunt throughout the house. It was a lot of work, but also great fun.”
 

She also admires her aunt, who lives in Amsterdam and was always a safe haven for her when she was new in the city at the age of eighteen. “She has a zest for life and a warmth that I greatly admire.”

Mayor Femke Halsema is also an example to her. ”She stands tall, despite all the criticism and attacks. She defends the rule of law with such determination. I really admire that.”

Ianthe's story is one of growth, resilience and learning to deal with challenges. Her message is clear: “You don't have to do everything perfectly and you can set your own boundaries. Don't be afraid to claim your place and show that it's possible.”